There Is A Freaking Bird Trapped In My Chest

Something's going on with me today. I've got a general shaky feeling. A flutter in the center of my rib cage (which in turn feels like it's wrapped in Saran Wrap). And it feels kind of moldy.

I want a Xanax and a drink and a cigarette. Or a Vicodin. And I want a bunch of boys sitting around me flirting with me and loud music and some kind of cool stuff to look at. That's the unhealthy side of me talking but you know the story of the hard dying of old habits.

However, I am not going to drink or smoke or ... well I might have a Xanax if it gets much worse.

I have 1.2 more days of work left before I head to Tahoe for 5 feet (and counting) of the fresh pow. The gnar, if you will. I am going to ski and ski and ski and just get all of this moldy shaky fluttery feeling OUT and get so tired on the mountain that I just fall asleep among the mayhem at my house. I hope.